Understanding Perspective

Throughout high school and college we often find the guys hanging out with the guys and the girls with the girls. This is how it has always been all throughout our lives while we are growing up. There are the boy toys, and then there are the girl toys. These ideas often lead us to believe who we are supposed to be hanging out with when we want to want to go out on the weekend or meet up for lunch. Everything is okay when people are following this idea we have developed. Why is it when someone of a certain gender begins to hang out the opposite gender does everyone begin to jump to conclusions?

When the guys hang out together it seems you are typically either playing sports or sitting around playing video games. The very moment one of those guys decides he is going to leave the guys and go hang out with a girl or a group of girls the other guys would have thought he had stolen something from them. Automatically, you are viewed as a trader. You are turning your back on your friends and you have become too good for them. If you’re just going to be hanging out with one girl, you might also take some heat from your guy friends, but this is normally something you can deal with. However, if you’re a guy who just feels he tends to fit in better hanging out with the girls or maybe just gets along better with them, hang on because you’re in for a lot more. If you are one of these guys you will automatically begin to hear the rumors swarming around that guys are saying you might be gay. Many guys just aren’t into playing sports all the time or are constantly out working on their cars. They like to do the things girls do like hang out watching Netflix, or go to the mall and shop.

For the girls this can become much worse for them. Throughout high school and even now in college, being a girl is harder than ever before. Many girls often find themselves in different cliques in high school or now in college in different sororities or RSOs. Sororities specifically are the types of groups that  are supposed to be hanging out with all the time and constantly keeping tabs on everything that is going on in each other’s lives. So, what happens when one of these girls decides that is not who she wants to hang out with? What if she wants to play sports with the boys, or even go out and see the newest superhero movie? For that girl she is going to encounter some of the hardest form of bullying and possibly even slander. It will begin the same as it would for a guy she will automatically be told that she is ditching her friends and that she thinks she is too good for them. As time goes on and she continues to hang out with the guys she will then begin to take even more abuse from the other girls by calling her a slut, skank, or any other offensive name. Along with this she will notice that her former girl friends are now beginning to exile her and no longer even bother inviting her to hang out with them. During school as she is often seen talking to the guys will be receiving various dirty looks from the other girls as if she is doing something wrong. For this girl, this can be very hard on her. She will often find herself feeling alone because she feels as though her old friends have turned their backs on her but she does not want to hang out with the guys because she is tired of hearing the names tied to her.

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